Well, I would rather start with the following — that was the WORST vacation in my life. I’ve never seen anything like this before. I’m not a writer, I don’t really like making up long-reads, except for when I feel really emotional. In this particular case I felt, I really felt that way. The audacity of presenting it as a 5-star hotel is just unbelievable, it’s not even 1. But let’s tell everything in order. Renovation thing. They were telling something about huge differences after they renovated this hotel. That’s a straight-up lie. The only thing that was done is new wallpapers (which stick off from the walls everywhere and in some places are even covered with stains or mold, I felt too gross to double check). The rest of it — ACs, toilets, showers, sinks, a half of the walls that wasn’t covered with cheep-ish wallpapers, furniture in the main hall, pool ladders, balcony doors (I’ll get back to this later) — is clearly outdated and needs to be replaced ASAP. The hotel is falling apart and it’s been only two months since opening. Strange, right? What’s more, they’ve apparently decided to leave as much as they could from Lyra Hotel, so you’re going to encounter Ancient Greek vibes everywhere. It’s a really strange mix of cartoon giraffes and “love”, “smile”, “hope” posters on the walls. Looks like they’ve been covering holes or something, the first impression was ruined. Air Conditioning. My biggest pain, while staying in Turkey every summer for five years, this felt like a silly joke. It looks like a dirty grille and works the same. If you enjoy when your room feels like sauna with +35 C outside, this place’s definitely for you. We set this terrifying thing at +10 degrees and max power, and it just didn’t work properly (for comparison, in previous hotels I set AC at +25 degrees and felt cold). When you lie in a bed, you can feel a sliiiiight wind, and the moment you step out of it — it’s a heat wave. I can’t even count the times I’ve complained about this inaffective, non-functioned thing at the reception point and to the guest relations manager, they don’t seem to care at all. What’s more, in general we applied for a repairman 6 times, and at the 6th time they tried to convince us that we’d never complained about that before, because they didn’t have any records in their system:) One night, a hilarious thing happened — there was a problem with electricity, and this mechanical monster started to breathe hot air. When I entered the room, I thought I would die instantly. After going downstairs to confront with reception staff (again), I saw a crowd that was yelling at them using all languages possible. It turned out that an immense number of people had the same problem. Their answer was, “well, no electricity, don’t know when fix this”. I had a sleepless night that day. It was the most outrageous thing during my vacation ever. And they could NEVER fix this, because nobody can fix it, it was supposed to be replaced BEFORE opening this season. Ma
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